For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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