Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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