how can u be prego again
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
