Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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