Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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