K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
