the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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