I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Alive.
So much puke
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize