cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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