dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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