You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I got inside last night via doggy door
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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