Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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