I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
They have beer where we have blood.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
