it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
