Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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