He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Randomize
