You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
