Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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