i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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