Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
P.S. I can't hear my feet
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Randomize
