She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
