she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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