hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
