YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
