She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
