Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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