I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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