if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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