I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
