we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
