come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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