does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
