I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
