ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
