Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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