operation have a gay friend backfired
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Randomize
