Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
