watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I need to align my fucking chakras
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
