I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
You ate ashes out of my bong
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
