i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
