He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
