Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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