I love black thongs
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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