Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
