READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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