she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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