Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
