I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
