Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
