Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
